Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas from our family to yours! We are hopeful that this time next year, we'll have one more member of the family to include in all the Christmas celebrations. The Advent season is a perfect time for us to contemplate how we should wait, and who should be our ultimate joy. We celebrate Christ's long awaited first coming, and we long for the day when he will return again. Through the ups and downs of infertility, adoption, and whatever else may come our way, He alone is our peace (Micah 5:5).

As some of you may have seen on Facebook, we are getting closer to our fundraising goal. We are about $6900 away from being fully funded. If you would like to join with us in this journey to bring Baby Anest home, please click HERE!

With love,
Chris and Jessica

Is Adoption for Me?

"I'm happy that you're adopting, but it's just not for me."

Have you ever had that thought? I did. I have also heard that sentiment in various forms since starting the adoption process with Chris. I want to challenge that thought for a moment, though.

If you are a believer in Jesus Christ, adoption is for you. No, not everyone should adopt a child into their family. But beyond your responsibility to care for the orphans and widows (the command given in James 1:27), your very identity is wrapped up in adoption.

YOU are adopted, and God calls you his child (1 John 3:1)

YOU are adopted, and God gives you a full inheritance in Christ (1 Peter 1:3-4)

YOU are adopted, not because you were good enough but simply because God loved you and wanted to (Ephesians 1:5)

God adopted YOU to praise him (Ephesians 1:11-12)

God adopted YOU and gave you freedom (Romans 8:15; Galations 4:5)

When you are able, take some time and listen to this fantastic sermon at CrossPointe Church (in my hometown of Columbus, GA) on Romans 8 and our adoption in Christ.

Romans 8:14–17, “The Spirit of Adoption” from CrossPointe Church on Vimeo.

Yardsale Success

It's been a GOOD day on the adoption front. SEBTS, the seminary where Chris is studying, has a yard sale each semester. We participated for the first time today and raised over $150 for our adoption. Praise the Lord!

I was particularly excited that we not only got to raise money, but we were able to get rid of things we don't use and make some space for the little one when he or she comes home. It was also really encouraging that some folks gave us money without buying anything or gave a little extra when they heard what where the money is going.

If you remember this post, for each donation toward our adoption, we are writing the donor's name on the back of a puzzle piece that will eventually be a visual reminder to our little one and us of the incredible support and help we have in getting a little one home. Today, we added 25 pieces to that puzzle! That's right, 25 people came by and bought nearly everything we had at the yard sale. That brings us to a grand total of 72 puzzle pieces purchased so far. Thank you to all the friends and family who have blessed us. If you still want to get in on this project, there are 180 pieces left!

"I call upon you, for you will answer me, O God; incline your ear to me; hear my words. Wondrously show your steadfast love, O Savior of those who seek refuge from their adversaries at your right hand." Psalm 17:6-7

SEBTS Yard Sale, bright and early. 

Premier Fundraiser

I (Jessica) had the opportunity to go see a good friend of mine, Aileen, this past weekend. She and I were college roommates for a year, and she remains one of my dearest friends. The extra long weekend with my friend was so needed and the Lord was good to give encouragement about our adoption left and right from Aileen and her sweet family.

Even though she has already helped us in a huge way by writing a reference letter for our adoption (thank you, Aileen!), she offered to help us raise funds towards the remaining amount we need for the adoption. I am sure it may seem like we're always posting about fundraising, but the reality is that adoption costs are the biggest roadblock for most families. So it is a BIG deal to us that our friends want to help us!

Here's what Aileen has offered: she sells a wonderful line of jewelry called Premier Designs, and for everything I sell from now until September 15, she will donate a portion of her commission to us. One of the great things I learned about Premier is that they donate a significant portion of their profits to missions. So not only do they offer a beautiful product, but they are sure to give back, too!

To the men who are thinking that this fundraiser isn't for you: I KNOW women in your life would love for you to give them a thoughtful gift, especially if there is a birthday or anniversary coming up :) It's not too early to start thinking of Christmas gifts, either!

Click here to view the catalog online. Click "browse the catalog" to see the jewelry available. You will need to provide your name, e-mail address, and the access code. The access code is STAR.

If you are in the Raleigh/Wake Forest area and would like to place an order, just contact me. I have order forms that you can fill out. You can pay by either check or credit card. If you are NOT in Raleigh and would like to order some jewelry, just send an e-mail to the address provided on the website above. Be sure to say that you want your order to support the Anest adoption.

All of the orders will be placed on September 15, and will be shipped to me. I will then distribute the items to everyone who has ordered.

Let me know if you have any questions!

My favorite pieces from the Premier catalog. Check out the online catalog to see more!

Viewbooks

For those of you who follow me on Instagram, you saw that I posted this photo last night. What is this, you ask? These are our viewbooks. When we finally get the last few documents needed to BEGIN our home study (not sure if that was clear on Instagram), complete the home study, and get on the waiting list, this will be what birthmothers view to help choose a family. The birth mother also often keep one copy of the chosen family's viewbook as a reminder. The viewbooks are essentially a narrative of our lives together in pictures. Some of you are in them! It was a huge moment to get these in the mail, even though we are likely still several months from anyone else ever looking at them. 

The most significant thing for me is thinking of the precious woman who will give life to our little one. The thought of her looking at these books is overwhelming. Whoever and wherever she is, whether she is already pregnant or not yet, we are so grateful for her. I pray for her often, and I would love for you to join me! 

Update!

It has been a while since we updated you on our adoption progress. We have been quite busy with travel, the end of another semester of seminary, and a little work in there somewhere ;)

First, thank you so much to those of you who have given to our adoption fundraiser or purchased Well Bean coffee to support us. We are grateful and overwhelmed at the generosity of friends, family, and even some who have made donations even though they don't know us. You are a part of our adoption story! We are a little closer to our goal, and for that we praise the Lord. Just as a reminder, if you would like to make a donation, please click the Pure Charity link on the right side of this page. You can also purchase Well Bean coffee on their website (just be sure to enter ANEST in the coupon code box when you check out so we receive 25% of the purchase!). Or for you Raleigh area folks, the Well Bean drive-thru is also graciously supporting our adoption. Let us know if you would like a support card, and go get a delicious smoothie or coffee!

Another thank you is due to our friends who have written letters of recommendation. We wouldn't be able to do this without you.

The big news for us lately is that we recently had a chance to visit some friends for about 10 days. We had a blast exploring a new city, laughing with our friends and their adorable kiddos, and trying some amazing food. We came back encouraged to press on in many areas, especially in our adoption. We are so grateful for these dear friends, and the people we met while we were there. A special shout out to two new friends who are now buying Well Bean to support our adoption!

Here are our friends' precious kids! How cute are they?! I felt like we got a little glimpse into the parenting life, and now I am even more excited for the little one that God has for our family.

 

So, where are we in the adoption process? We are STILL completing paperwork for our homestudy. Will you pray for us, that God will grant us the time and efficiency to finish quickly? Especially with Chris taking one seminary class this summer and Army training obligations, we need God's help to finish it all. We have two major things left before we can begin the homestudy: background checks -- these have been submitted and we are waiting on a few of the results -- and finishing the required training (we have 2 books to read). Our goal is to begin the homestudy in AUGUST!

 

Thank you for your prayers, support, and love.

 

-- Jessica

Coffee With a Cause

If you are anything like us, you need a cup or two of coffee in the morning to get the day started. We need it for the caffeine, of course, but also because we just enjoy good coffee. And we enjoy drinking it together.

One of our favorite things to do when exploring a new city is to find a good, locally owned coffee shop. For that reason, our most recent partner in our adoption process is an absolutely perfect fit for our family. Well Bean Coffee is a local coffee shop that serves ethically sourced coffee, smoothies, and healthy snacks. Not only do we appreciate their coffee, but the owner and marketing director are friends of ours! We love their mission to serve good coffee and serve the community. They also give $1 of every sale to NewSong Nicaragua, a mission organization in Central America.

Our friends at Well Bean have offered to give us 25% of every sale online that uses our adoption code: ANEST. To order a bag of coffee, just go to their website and click "shops" and then "coffee retail." Once you are there, choose the kind of coffee you want, along with the size bag and grind. When you check out, be sure to put in our code (ANEST), and voila! That is all you need to do.

If you would like to tell us that you bought a bag of coffee to help our adoption, we would love that! We want to include as many friends in our adoption puzzle project as possible. See the previous blog post that explains the puzzle here.

Thank you all for your continued support and encouragement.

With love,
Chris & Jessica

Another Milestone!

Hello, friends and family! We wanted to ask for your prayers this weekend, as we will be attending a training session with our adoption agency on Saturday. This is a necessary step before we can begin our homestudy, and we are excited about what we'll learn there and that this will bring us one step closer to bringing our child home. Please pray that we will trust the Lord with this process and that we will be an encouragement to the other families who will be there with us.

We also wanted to say THANK YOU to those who have donated already to our adoption fundraiser. There are already 7 puzzle pieces with names on them :) We are blown away by the generosity of our friends and family. We truly could not do this without you! If you would still like to make a donation, please click on the Adoption Changes Everything link on the right side of this blog.

Last (at least for this post), a friend of ours shared this hilarious yet true video on the crazy things adoptive parents hear. Enjoy!

How can you help us? I'm glad you asked!

The thought of adopting a little one into our home is exciting, but there are a lot of fees and expenses along the way. Money has been, and I'm sure will continue to be, the most challenging thing about our whole adoption experience. We have felt that God in his Holy Spirit is pressing on our hearts to seek out adoption from right here in North Carolina. But just because we know where God is leading us doesn't mean that we always know how we will get there. We have to trust that God will move in the hearts of our family and friends in order to help us raise the money needed to bring our new son or daughter home.

So here is the part where we ask you to give. 

There are two ways you can give. First (and most importantly) you can pray for us. Give of your time to pray for us as we walk through the stressful time of working, making sacrifices to save money, doing paperwork over and over again, getting physicals, going to required training and counseling, and meeting with the social worker to complete our home study. Pray that we would live out our faith well in each of these situations. Pray that we would be mindful of our thoughts and actions toward each other within our marriage as we sometimes feel like we're in a pressure cooker and other times we don't see how God will ever bring this whole process to fruition. Pray that we would experience joy as we live out the gospel and adopt another person into our family, just as God adopted us into His. 

After you have prayed for us, the second way you can give is by donating money. Below are the two major costs that we need help with, and below each I listed the different things that are being done with the money given to the adoption agency. 

First is the waiting list fee, which is $5,000. By giving this money to the agency, the agency then provides the following: 

• Counseling and related services to birth families
• Advertising (the adoptive parents to the birth families)
• Communication by the agency staff to the adoptive parents
• Meetings with potential birth parents (when applicable)
• General Operating Expenses
• Publications
• Maintaining adoptive parent profile on agency website
• Other operational costs related to adoption services

The second fee is the placement fee, which is $15,000. By giving this money to the agency, the agency then provides the following:

• Post placement supervision
• Hospital time and discharge
• Child placement
• Legal documentation preparation for the birth families
• Execution of documents and submission to court
• Termination of birth father's rights
• Court hearing
• Ongoing counseling with birth parents
• Finalization of document preparation and submission for adoptive family
• Communication with adoptive family
• General operating expenses. 
• Post relinquishment counseling to birthparents on grief, life, relationships and sexual integrity. 

You can donate at our fundraising site by clicking here 
(or click on our widget on the right side of the blog)

We are also doing something special with the puzzle from our previous post. 

The first 252 people that donate anything will get their name written on the back of a puzzle piece. We are going to put the puzzle together and frame it in a two sided frame to hang it in the baby's room. One day we will use the puzzle to tell our little one their adoption story, complete with all the people who wanted him or her to be a part of our family.

**Please note: all donations are going straight to the adoption agency, so they are all tax deductible as well. 

Pieces of the Puzzle

More details about this to come soon, but we're excited about a special puzzle that will be in our little one's room someday!

Our Adoption FAQs

I think there may be some confusion based on our last post. Sorry about that. When we say, "we're adopting," we really mean that we're in the process of adoption.

I suppose now is a good time to answer some of the FAQs about our adoption.

Q: Domestic or international adoption?
A: We are pursuing a domestic adoption, so our little one will be from the US, and likely from North Carolina

Q: What age child are you adopting?
A: Under 2, but our agency has told us that most of the children that they place with families are newborns. That's pretty exciting for us because we'll get to experience all the milestones with our little one.

Q: How many children are you adopting?
A: Probably one for now, but we'll see what the Lord has planned ;)

Q: Boy or girl? What race? Etc...
A: We don't know! We have no preference, so we'll find out the day we receive a call that a little one is waiting for us. What a day that will be!

Q: What does the adoption process look like?
A: I can only speak about our domestic adoption experience, but it is by no means a short process. We don't get to simply turn in an application and receive a baby (thank goodness). The first stage of the process is filling out a ton of paperwork and training for the homestudy. We have to disclose everything about our lives, from our hobbies and what our home looks like to a medical exam and a detailed view of our finances. We are in this stage. Hopefully, we're nearing the end of this part. Then, we'll begin the homestudy with a social worker (I hear there is more paperwork during the homestudy, too). This could take up to three months, and requires several visits with our social worker. We can then be on the agency's waiting list. And then we wait…

If you have any other questions, leave a comment and we'll be glad to answer them.

--Jessica

Why Not Now?

Hopefully this post will answer at least one of the questions you may have about adoption: why? Why are we adopting at all, and why are we pursuing it now?

We are confident that adoption is a good thing that is ordained by God. After all, adoption is his plan for us.

"In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace, which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ  as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth" (Ephesians 1:5-10).

So, in love we are adopted and adopting. Our primary reason for adopting is that we want to reflect the heart of God toward the fatherless. While not all must adopt, Scripture is abundantly clear that we should care for the fatherless and widows (Deut. 10:18; Psalm 68:5-6; James 1:27...just to name a few). One way you can do this is by supporting couples who are adopting. There are so many ways you can do this, so just ask!

We are also adopting because we believe that children are blessings from the Lord. We are very much looking forward to being parents!

So why now? For quite some time, adoption has been a part of our Plan A. We felt the Lord leading us toward adoption, but just thought it would be a "someday" sort of thing. Our plan was to have a few biological children, then pursue adoption. Through some difficult years of dealing with infertility, our heart has begun to shift in regard to "our plans." Our illusion of control in planning our family was quickly shattered, and seems almost comical now. We knew the Lord wants us adopt, so we began asking "why not now?" We couldn't think of a single good reason. Perhaps the Lord was simply opening the door to adoption sooner than we thought.

There are a lot of good reasons to adopt now:
- We're in a relatively stable place, by the grace of God
- We would love the opportunity to be parents, and would welcome a child into our family
- There are THOUSANDS of children who need forever families each year.
- The Lord keeps pulling our hearts towards adoption. 

Lord help us if adoption ever becomes a desperate attempt to get children by any means possible. That's not why we're adopting. Adoption will never heal the heartache of infertility (or any other issue in a family), and it isn't meant to. Instead, adoption is a great way for our family to reflect the Father's love for us. We love you already, little one!

We are ADOPTING!

We are adopting, and so very excited to share our journey with you all! There will certainly be more to come in the next few days about why, how, when, and where…but for now, here are some of our adoption announcement photos by the wonderful Rebecca Keller. 

Taking the photos made this journey seem more "real" to us, and for me (Jessica) it was one of those moments that my friend, Kaci, talks about in her blog. I love her description of the really important moments in adoption: they are like the kicks in a pregnancy that make mom and dad so excited and ready to meet their baby! This was definitely an "adoption kick" moment :)